7 years ago I read a book called “No More Prisons” written by William “Upski” Wimsatt. In his book he brought up a very interesting idea that I had never considered before, a whole new view of something that I saw daily in the area I was living in. The impact was very substantial to me and it was that the public was so instilled with fear of one another that we chose to create prison cells around ourselves in order to feel safe.
As a youth I had always seen these gated communities as small metropolis of wealth in areas of poverty and despair. If I was to imagine anything symbolic about their place in a society it was simply that it was an exclusiveness abode for wealth. The gates seemed to taunt me that I was not worthy of entering. Well, that is not completely accurate because I did enter them many times but it was part of my job as security. Not exactly prestigious enough to alter my view that I was not welcome just so long as I was in service of the wealthy inhabitants. But this would all change.
“For every road and zoo and gated community and fence and lock and alarm system and prison we build, we are installing another prison cell in our hearts. “
His words pierced my heart and awoke me to feelings deep within that I had never considered in the past. The feeling that I was a prisoner in some way. I began to consider all the ways that I am a prisoner from my obsessive desire to be appreciated by others, to the manner in which I conducted relationships, to the fact that I was reading this book having left my home town to flee to the mountains. Instead of being surrounded by steel bars and an electric fence, I was surrounded by acres of Pines but the essence and reasoning was still the same, I was seeking isolation due to fear.
“Those who fear life are already three parts dead.” Bertrand Russell
It was at this realization that something in me began to well up. I found myself actually weeping intensely not just over my own realization, but over the gravity of the effect this had on all of existence. It was because for the first time a reality had hit me that had for so long remained hidden from sight, yet it ruled my existence for as far back as I could remember. I knew that this was not just in my case, but in millions throughout the world. I stepped out onto my girlfriends balcony and peered over the city she lived in and I saw acres of walls and fences. I heard a car alarm screaming in the distance and noticed that the two largest buildings in the city were a hospital and a prison. One to protect your life from death and the other to protect life from you. I watched as a police officer cruised by on patrol. I heard the sound of people spanking a child in the apartments across from me as the child shrieked in pain. I set there staring at the city and tried to imagine what would happen if none of these objects of “safety” were not present. What if there were no prisons? That was a scary thought because there is so much evil in the hearts of people. But then again, what is the purpose of living if you are just going to be tormented by fear.
“He that is kind is free, though he is a slave; he that is evil is a slave, though he be a king”- Saint Augustine
I grew up in economically disadvantaged areas most of my life. We were not necessarily poor by the standard set by those surrounding me, but certainly by the standard of your typical white family in America. As one of only two white kids riding the bus to school, I witnessed first hand the anger many races had toward white people in impoverished neighborhoods. Also, being a white person, I also witnessed the type of comments made by whites regarding other races. To say the least, I was not particularly sympathetic to any race. They all had their reasons of course. No good racist would be complete without some sort of logical excuse for their prejudice. Such is the case with all sorts of evil that I have witnessed. Nobody says that they are evil, they always have a reason for doing what they did. For the same reason that every criminal says they are innocent I suppose. Often it is justified as a retaliation for a wrong committed toward them. I witnessed street violence, domestic violence, and suffered abuses of my own. My fear growing up was intense, and perhaps by coincidence, so was my anger. The only thing that I can remember clearly about my decision to become so violent and self destructive was that I figured if I can’t beat them, I should join them. So I did. I eventually turned dark and angry enough to earn respect from some people that I can honestly say were dangerous. I felt powerful over my fear finally. I stopped fearing by embracing the anger to the point that I did not even fear the least bit, so I thought. I still look back in amazement at the fact that nothing made me more angry then when somebody provoked my fear or took notice of it. I became enraged in self defense and this was true with the gang members I would hang around. Nothing was more disgraceful then being fearful, even though we all were. We were literally slaves to our fear.
After having 7 guns pulled on me in only 5 years and realizing that I was on a fast lane to self destruction, I decided to clear my head by moving to the mountains. Looking back, it was probably the best decision I ever made. Though that was not exactly the immediate end to my destructive behavior, it did eventually lead me to some solid ground and massive soul searching. I began to read books for the first time in my life. That is when, among many others books, No More Prisons became a part of my reading list. It helped that I had a similar background as he did, being a white kid around other races. I had a time in graffiti and hip hop was very much a priority in my life. I was a b-boy for many years and felt that hip hop culture gave me a reason for living. His message was pure and straight from the heart. I was willing to hear it from him because he felt the same thing I did. I can say that book was significant in breaking many of the chains in my life. It allowed me to face my fears, to cry about my past, to be a human being and not feel that the goodness in me was weakness, but strength. It helped me become free by bringing my attention to the chains I had never noticed before. I realized the most important thing, that the reason there is so much evil in the world is because the fact that so many are too afraid to choose to be good. It is easier to embrace the anger and defend onces self then it is to turn the other cheek. I decided to have the courage to do that. Somebody has to start!
One generation plants the trees; another gets the shade.- Chinese Proverb
Well, I guess it is time for me to be heading off my soap box. So cue the sappy deep message music. After all, I could write for a very long time about such topics because all joking aside, I really care about this stuff. In my experience there have been only a few things that I can cling to as truth. Truth, Love and Freedom is certainly one of the things. The problem and one of the biggest misconceptions about freedom and how people perceive it. I believe that is due to what I call the dualistic nature of the world. We often try to define terms by looking to the opposites. We use light to define darkness, and darkness to define light. I believe that this is an error. Take freedom for example since that is what we are talking about here, well kinda. What is the opposite of freedom? Most would probably say Slavery. Slavery is defined as being in bondage against ones will. Well in order for freedom to be the opposite it seems only logical that all people would have to want to be free. Yet with all that claim to want freedom, the majority place themselves in prisons of various sorts; physical, mental and emotional. They are not prisons that prevent us from effecting others but from others effecting us. Yet just as Wimsatt said, “For every road and zoo and gated community and fence and lock and alarm system and prison we build, we are installing another prison cell in our hearts. “ We may be keeping people out, but we are in effect also keeping ourselves in. Therefor it is a prison and prison is not a happy place to be.
I have come to the conclusion though it would not make perfect sense to call fear the opposite of freedom, however it is certainly more of an inhibitor to freedom than anything else I can imagine. Fear is the fuel that allows tyranny and oppression to take hold. It is the catalyst for hatred and war. Ironically the only cure for fear is to face up to it. To tackle it head on regardless of the consequences and once we see that consequences are not as bad as bad as its fruit, it goes away. If we choose to isolate ourselves and not overcome this barrier, we will continue to increase the level of separation in our culture. That is what is so profound about the prisons of comfort we put ourselves into. It is an endless cycle that only perpetuates further separation, further fear and ultimately, further hate. So I challenge you to break some chains this week. I challenge you to find a complete stranger, hopefully one that you are afraid of, and talk to them. Perhaps it is somebody of another race or religion. Perhaps it is a biker or a gang member. I bet if you are nice to them they will be nice back. Give it a try, why not.
